Hot Cocoa Part 2

Yoshi is making hot cocoa for everyone after our snow play day. 

Me: I think I'm going to drink all the hot chocolate that Amma is making. 

Vian (5yo): If you drink my hot chocolate, I'm going to punch you 5 million times in your face. 

Me: You can't even count that high, Vian. 

Vian: Ok then I'm going to punch you one hundred times. 


Confidence of a 5yo

I don't know how to play Minecraft. Vian (5yo) decided he's going to educate me. We're now playing real-world Minecraft in the front yard without a computer. He's narrating various aspects of the game as he's walking around the front yard. A leather armor, iron ingot, wooden pickax, bedrock and so on. 

Then he delivers this pearl of wisdom. 

Vian: Here's a good tip. When you're in the game don't mess with me. I'm invincible and I can fly. 

Then proceeds to extol the virtues of bedrock and diamond pickax. 

Bejeezus

The kids like to scare me by trying to jump out from under the covers and yell "BOO!". I like to pretend that I'm scared of their tactics. The other day I decided to return the favor by suddenly entering their room and yelling "BOO!". I managed to scare Vian and he started giggling in fear and shrunk back under his comforter. 

Me: Hey Vian, looks like I scared the bejeezus out of you. 

Vian: No! No! I'm not scared. I don't even have any bejeezus, so you didn't really scare any bejeezus. 

Picture Day

Vian is back from school, wearing a button up shirt and slacks.

Me: Vian, you look dapper today. 

Vian: Yeah. Today was picture day.

Me: Oh yeah. Did you guys go out and take a picture?

Vian: No. It was just someone else taking the picture. I didn't take the picture.


Talking to my kids is the best way for me to realize how imprecise my communication is. 

Michelangelo

Tonight we read Calvin and Hobbes for bedtime. After I read the comic strip above, I tried to explain a little about Michelangelo. 

Me: Remember, Michelangelo, we saw the statues he made when we went to Italy?

Sempi: Yeah.

Me: He's a great sculptor. Do you guys remember the David statue?

Vian: I know who Michelangelo is, he's a TURTLE!

o_O