Shortened names

Sempi and Yoshi are playing with trucks. Sempi is showing off his collection of trucks. 

Sempi: This is a steam roller, an excavator, ass truck and a low boy.

Yoshi: Ass truck? 

Sempi: Yeah it dumps out asphalt. 

Yoshi: Of all the trucks you could have abbreviated, you choose the asphalt truck...?

Hug Machine

Yoshi is sitting on the floor wiping some of Sempi's pee.

Sempi runs up to her from behind and gives her a hug. 

Yoshi: Aw! Thank you sweetie. 

Sempi: I'm not hugging you, I'm waiting for my piggy back ride. 

Yoshi: Of course you are...


Potty Creativity

This is part of Sempi's potty training series.

Today he successfully pooped in his portable potty.

Sempi: Appa the poop looks like a hot dog. 

Me: Thanks man, thanks for that imagery. I'm glad I'm a vegetarian.


Chocolate Juice

We're potty training Sempi. You've been warned. 


Sempi: Appa would you like some chocolate juice. 

Me: Chocolate Juice? Sure. (I'm highly suspicious)

Sempi: Come to the bathroom I'll make you some chocolate juice. 

Me: (My suspicions were confirmed?)

Sempi runs to the bathroom and uses the spring loaded toilet paper holder as his juicer. Makes blender sounds while pressing down on his juicer.

Sempi: Here you go. (Hands me a pretend cup)

I'm somewhat relieved. 

Sempi: I need your debit card to pay. 


Orange Juice with p**p

Happy New Year 2016

Yoshi is baking a strawberry cake. I'm helping Sempi squeeze some oranges to make orange juice.

Me: We're almost done squeezing.

Sempi: I like my orange juice with poop. 

Me: You what? 

Sempi: I like my orange juice with poooop. Pooolp.

Me: Oh you mean pulp. I see. *phew*

We had some delicious cake and drank orange juice with puuuulp.